Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

Why did the chicken cross the street? K

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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