''In Austin, Texas, President Obama told an audience, 'If you want to go forward you put your car in 'D.' If you want to go backward, you put your car in 'R.'' But you know something? Either way, the economy is still F'd.''

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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3 brothers Mohammed, Ahmed and Saahad were on the 09:25 flight from Tehran to New York. They each only carried a rucksack each and a one way ticket. They are Syrian refugees and their parents are dead.

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

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Did you hear about the man who went up into space without a space suit? He died.

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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Blah blah something about Ryan Dunn.

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What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

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Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

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what does mandy enjoy on weekends a load of cum in her face

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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joe diragi whacks off his dog

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

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How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

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Why are white people afraid of black people? The holocaust

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What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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