Why was the little boy crying? Well first off he is adopted. He then woke up and found out his pop star dad is dead. ..... His name is blinket.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

I can count to potato.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

charlie sheen

What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

what did the dog say to the retarded black guy ? bark

How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

Keanu Reaves

How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

What do two Jews have in common? They both practice the same religion.

Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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