A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby wearing a clown suit.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

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Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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How much wood would Chuck Wood have if Chuck Wood could have wood? None, Chuck Wood has E.D.

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A person from Singapore eats

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

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what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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