How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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What does Snoop Dogg eat when he's sick? Chicken Noodle Snoop.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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The joke below is absolute shit.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

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Q: What's more silly than the idea of a wealthy, successful black man? A: A Clown

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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