An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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