Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

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Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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to get to the other side.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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there was once a jew

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your family die in a fire.

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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