what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Why did the kid fall off his swing? Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

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What do gay cows eat? Grass.

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

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No.

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THE GAME.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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