A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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Dead on Aodhan your breaking te ten commandments by lying you jew you dont believe in the divinity of Christ.

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What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

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A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

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How High is a Chinese man

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There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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they told me not to write here but i did

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

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how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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