Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

How do you get a baby into a bowl? Use a blender. How do you get the baby out of the bowl? Tortilla chips.

What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

squash squash who squash my ass

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

what did the lamp say to the hand? You turn me on

What was the energizer bunny arrested for? Rape.

What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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