What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a boy with one eye and no arms. -Mean names.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a boy meets a girl the rest is censored

thumb_up thumb_down -16

where did juan go after getting hit by a bus? the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

KILL WHITEY

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

my mind's eye?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana Your parents must have little regard for your social identity because they named you after a tropical fruit. Either that or you are clinically insane. I am concerned; please leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a bunch of black people hanging out in a barn? African American farmers socializing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops