Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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one day a white guy was in detroit. it was very strange. nothing happened

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Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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