Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

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What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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