A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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