a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

a chicken walks into a cafe, where it is swiftly caught, killed, plucked ,and served with stuffing and all for £5.99

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

What do Jim Carrey, Kim Jing-un and Justin Bieber have in common? A penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

What do you call a boy with one eye and no arms. -Mean names.

Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

knock knock whos their a person

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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