A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

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What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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a black man and a white man walk into a job interview. neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

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Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

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Morning wood.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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