What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

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Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

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What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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What happens when you spend far too much money in a gambling machine during a solar eclipse on a leap year? You get poor.

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How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops