Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

What do gay cows eat? Grass.

You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

poop

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

Sally went to an R-Kelly concert what happend when she came out? No one because R-Kelly peed on sally and cops came in.

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

Why did the man shoot up the movie theater? Because he spent his whole child hood playing Call of Duty Black Ops II, Left 4 Dead 2, and Minesweeper. And video games, are the only thing that would rive someone to shoot up a movie theater.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

Snow White found a magic lamp in the middle of the forest. She rubbed it and became pregnant because the spout was a penis.

Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

Robert had 30 cheeseburgers and he ate 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes.

What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

I have aids

What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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