Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black and so is my neighbor

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A man walks into a bar... he is blind so it isn't funny

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if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

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What do two Jews have in common? They both practice the same religion.

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A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

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Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

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How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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Why did the boy in a wheelchair cry? His mum just got shot in front of his eyes.

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Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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