Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When you cross a bird on the sidewalk what do you do??? Run in big circles.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q.Whats the differents between justin bieber and a girl A.Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -33

My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

thumb_up thumb_down -35

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you call a something with no limbs? a snake

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops