Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

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How come anti jokes r funny

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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fduck

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Anti-Jokes are the bomb .org

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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