What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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GIRL: Honey, for a holiday we should go someplace nice BOY: How will that work, none of us speak Mexican...

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

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What do you call a dinosaur eating a taco? Nothing, you are high.

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Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

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I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

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My penis is big... not.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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