Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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hahahahaha thats not funny

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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Roses are red grass is green get on th bed and I'll fill you wilpth my cream ;)

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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How did the Muslim girl get pregnant? She was brutally raped on the streets of Baghdad.

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How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

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I STUCK MY TESTICLE IN A BLENDER!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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