Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

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Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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What is the best kind of necro? Dead necro.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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