Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

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Have you seen the 6th sense? Nope, is it good? Yeah Bruce Willis is dead

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Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

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Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? The list goes on.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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What did the grape do after it was stepped on? Nothing, as it was incapacitated, and even under normal circumstances, it would be incapable of performing any voluntary actions as it is only a grape.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

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how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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watch me nae nae

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why is rebecca black? because it's friday.

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Elizabeth Warren

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Bob: Hey, hey Jim Jim: Yeah? Bob: Remember me. Jim: ...okay?? Bob: Knock knock Jim: Who's there? Bob: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FRICKIN REMEMBER ME!!!

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Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

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What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

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Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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