What is the same about fries chicken and watermelon? There both delicious.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

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How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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Why didn't the man go to work? He got stabbed.

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A BRICK!!

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What do you call an Oliver with friends? A dream

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What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an egg? Ones delicious with bacon, the others an egg.

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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