What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse replies "my wife died yesterday." the next day the bartender wakes up and realises that it didn't happen and that he is a drunk asshole with no life.

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Obama

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Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

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Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

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What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

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Why did the man fall down? Because he was pushed of a 5 story building

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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i fell like im going to reverse john becase i ate a bikle penis jackson

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What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

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What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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How long is a china man?

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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WHO WANTS SOW????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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