what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

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Mr Whelk visited his doctor. His doctor put on a sterile glove and inserted two fingers into the man's rectum. "Does this feel all right?" The doctor asked "Yes" replied Mr Whelk. "But is my wrist broken or not?

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My penis is big... not.

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9/11

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

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jcjdj

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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;aosughdfo

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Q:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Did you hear the joke about the Israeli guy with the cruise missile down his pants? Me neither. I hope it's a good joke.

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whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

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What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

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What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

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What's worse than waking up with cancer? Waking up dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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