A duck walks into a bar, but he is kicked out because he is not 21

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Needless to say,

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knock, knock who's there owls owls who thats right owls who

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I think everybody ought to have a penis.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What's a stupid joke on anti-joke? One that involves a random number with absolutely no meaning

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

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Why did the cat bite its owner? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name is Paco, And yours is too.

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender was just about to leave, so he takes the dog home with him. He makes found dog signs and posts them around the neighborhood. The owner sees one of the signs and retrieves his pet from the bartender, thanking him for finding his dog.

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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Two friends sit down to dinner, the third is late so they eat him

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You: I have a question Person: Yes You: Do you have an answer?

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Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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