How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

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What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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Hi what I lug you

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Why couldn't the women cook for her family She had no arms, therefore incapable of preforming the task.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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21

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

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How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops