What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? -because she had no arms Why didn't she get back up? -because she had no legs Why diddn't anyone help her? -because she was black.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

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Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

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what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

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what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

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What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

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What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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