why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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What did the man without a tongue say...

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why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

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what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion. What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant scorpions

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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tight butthole 4 lyfe.

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A guy orders soup at the resturant and says to the waiter, "will you try this soup?" The waiter says "what is it too hot?" the guy says "just try the soup." the waiter asks "Is it too cold?" the guy sais just try the soup." the waiter says "fine, where's the spoon?" AHAHHH!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops