A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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Knock Knock Who's There AT&T Guy Mom it's for you

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Two gorillas swing into a bar and are promptly escorted out because the gorillas are alcoholics.

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a man is running away

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roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

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A: my name is Joe and i like onion B: ok

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Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops