When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

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yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

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Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

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1.....2.....3.....boom you died

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why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

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why are tree's green cause that's how god made it

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Dear God, That wasn't cool. Seriously. From, Japan

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Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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Whats Black White and Red all over? oh, wait. what time were we supposed to meet that landlord?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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