Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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i can't stand cripple jokes

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Mark Wilson

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Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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