A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What was the pirate's favorite letter W

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's who? Knock knock!

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

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Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

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What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

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Q. Why do Italian men have mustaches? A. So they can look like their mothers.

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you know whats funny... nothing.

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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Can you answer one question for me? Yes Thank you

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops