Guy 1: I had a Energy Drink the other day, I crashed. Guy 2: Really? That must of sucked. Guy 1: Yeah, the family in the other car died.

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ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

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How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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roses are red violets are blue you think shes hot? how BLIND are you?

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out of your comfort zone

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how do you start a stamped in mexico roll a nickle down the street sad thing is you just lost a nickle

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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Womens Rights.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

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Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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