If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

Donald Trump

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

Cripples are lame.

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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