What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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Three construction workers are high up on a building when they decide to take their lunch break there. The three open their respective lunches, converse pleasantly, and enjoy the fine weather.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops