What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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womens rights

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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