Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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