what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

I am a mime

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

asians have slitted eyes lol

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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