What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Women's Rights

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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