a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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