Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

thumb_up thumb_down +16

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops