when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...