The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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