What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

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All Bin Laden wanted was peace on earth and good will toward men.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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