Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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sadf

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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