BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Im adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the young boy fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops