''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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autistic kids rock

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

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what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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