9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

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That is so fetch

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what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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