A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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Matthew Baker

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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