roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

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Q: why are black people so much darker than white people? A: genetics.

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

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what unique about 3 red signs and 1 blue sign right next to eachother? there all the same colors!!!!except for the blue sign.

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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