Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

thumb_up thumb_down -2

eat a hot dog

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

gingers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black on top, and white on the bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo mom as so dumb.... That she has a low IQ

thumb_up thumb_down -2

DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops