What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

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Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

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A man walked into a bar owch

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Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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